Just Like a Woman

gophi says:

[love]

Cytat:| As always :)
| i guess you are a very lucky guy, then :p
We can assume it ;)

ok, just beware. there are some very bitter men (and women) out there.

Cytat:| I love her, she loves me, but she lives far away from me :(
| aww, a sad-ish love story with a happy end, i hope.
I hope it will never end... :) But I know that everything
has the end.

well, uh, ending doesn't necessarely mean, like, _end_ you know. it
might mean you getting married with her or so.

Cytat:| kaboooom! without the sound effect tho. my hd crashed.
My hd sometimes sounds weird too... I backupped my home dir.

yes, backup. people _remember_ to backup. my backup was two years
old. sigh.

sr

|
| Ooooo, to ja o czymś nie wiem? ;))) DObra, spadam, bo
| znowu zaczną marudzić ;)))

Wiesz, wiesz ;)
Jo, ja też. Wysyłam jeszcze dowcip i już mnie nie ma.

A man walked into a bar and asked the barman for 20 shots of whiskey!

" What's wrong? " the barman asked.

" I just found out my son was gay!! " the man said.

The next night he came in and asked for 50 shoots of whiskey.

" What's wrong? " the barman asked.

" I just found out my other son was gay!! " the man said.

The next night the man came in again and asked for 70 shoots of whiskey!

The barman said, " Doesn't anyone in your family like women?"

And the man says, " Yes....MY WIFE!!!!!

Pozdrawiam :)

Cytat:A man walked into a bar and asked the barman for 20 shots of whiskey!
" What's wrong? " the barman asked.
" I just found out my son was gay!! " the man said.
The next night he came in and asked for 50 shoots of whiskey.
" What's wrong? " the barman asked.
" I just found out my other son was gay!! " the man said.
The next night the man came in again and asked for 70 shoots of whiskey!
The barman said, " Doesn't anyone in your family like women?"
And the man says, " Yes....MY WIFE!!!!!

ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTFL:))))

kubunio

Cytat:'Grime'

jak lubisz takie klimaty to obowiazkowo

http://www.pitchforkmedia.com/record-reviews/comp/679/run-the-road.shtml

The 16-track compilation RUN THE ROAD is the stateside coming-out party
for the UK scene known as "grime." Mixing elements of techno,
drum-and-bass, reggaeton, and hardcore rap, grime was born in the
housing projects of London, and came of age in the city's underground
clubs and on independently produced recordings. The backing to grime
tracks is often 1980s-inspired, with highly processed beats and thin
keyboard sounds that evoke the era of Kraftwerk and Afrika Bambaataa.
Yet the raps are utterly contemporary, unleashed at a furiously
accelerated pace in a dizzying, pan-global mix of hip-hop street-slang,
West Indies patois, and London working-class accents. Two artists
associated with grime-- the Streets and Dizzee Rascal--have made
commercial headway in the States (both performers appear here with
B-sides previously available only on import). But the real revelation is
the caliber of artists like Kano (whose "P's and Q's" is a highlight),
No Lay (one of the few women here), and Wonder & Plan B (who offer up
the spare, funky anthem "Cap Back"). A superb introduction to a
just-breaking genre, 2005's RUN THE ROAD hits with all of the
unadulterated force of something just let out of the box

Cytat:
dzien wielkich plyt normalnie:
http://www.pitchforkmedia.com/record-reviews/comp/679/run-the-road.shtml

The 16-track compilation RUN THE ROAD is the stateside coming-out party
for the UK scene known as "grime." Mixing elements of techno,
drum-and-bass, reggaeton, and hardcore rap, grime was born in the
housing projects of London, and came of age in the city's underground
clubs and on independently produced recordings. The backing to grime
tracks is often 1980s-inspired, with highly processed beats and thin
keyboard sounds that evoke the era of Kraftwerk and Afrika Bambaataa.
Yet the raps are utterly contemporary, unleashed at a furiously
accelerated pace in a dizzying, pan-global mix of hip-hop street-slang,
West Indies patois, and London working-class accents. Two artists
associated with grime-- the Streets and Dizzee Rascal--have made
commercial headway in the States (both performers appear here with
B-sides previously available only on import). But the real revelation is
the caliber of artists like Kano (whose "P's and Q's" is a highlight),
No Lay (one of the few women here), and Wonder & Plan B (who offer up
the spare, funky anthem "Cap Back"). A superb introduction to a
just-breaking genre, 2005's RUN THE ROAD hits with all of the
unadulterated force of something just let out of the box

gdyby ktos chcial zablyszczec w towarzystwie ;D

Cytat:little jack in the box
historia jakich wiele zdarza się tylko
raz like little you
know kalejdoskop i pierwszy -
śnieg mamo
na boso po
śniegu nocą
negatyw po
mnie w tobie
na wysypisku śmiechu szukaj ostatnich
kolorowych szkiełek przezroczystych
dziewczyn co kaleczą wargi szukaj
dzieci w pudełkach made in just-a-joke

zabij women on waves
shit żyje wiecznie
bez kitu you can kill it

Prawda to moje imię
wieczny odpoczynek racz im
na falach
i zaspach
bez podatku

a berbecie już nie płaczą ...

[a ślimaki hyc- hyc]

Cytat:notinnocent<

Cytat:
| little jack in the box
| historia jakich wiele zdarza się tylko
| raz like little you
| know kalejdoskop i pierwszy -
| śnieg mamo
| na boso po
| śniegu nocą
| negatyw po
| mnie w tobie
| na wysypisku śmiechu szukaj ostatnich
| kolorowych szkiełek przezroczystych
| dziewczyn co kaleczą wargi szukaj
| dzieci w pudełkach made in just-a-joke
zabij women on waves
shit żyje wiecznie
bez kitu you can kill it
Prawda to moje imię
wieczny odpoczynek racz im
na falach
i zaspach
bez podatku
a berbecie już nie płaczą ...
[a ślimaki hyc- hyc]
--
| notinnocent<
a puenta is:

nie stawiaj rowera koło
lodówki bo
kisiel wystygnie...

Singuranga

Cytat:
się w tym kontekście. Możesz podać całość z uwzględnieniem paru zdań przed
i paru zdań po? Bardzo chętnie oderwę się na chwilę od polichromii
wieloskrzydłowych nastaw ołtarzowych.

Wyrazy współczucia z powodu w.w.

No to do kontekstu!
- Just what is wrong with you these days? You're wandering round in a dream.
- Perhaps he is in love. Is that right? Is the great senor "marriage is not
for me" Dario actually smitten at last?
- Don't tease him Mercedes. I just think he has a lot on his mind.
- A lot of woman - his sister laughed. - Is that it? It would have to be
someone really special to knock my brother sideways like this!
A lot of woman. He certainly knew someone who fitted that description.

Ufff!
Czasem z tęsknotą wspominam, jak tłumaczyłam opis kucia XV wiecznego miecza
a potem lekcji szermierki tymze 8-(
No nic, o 21 zrobie sobie przerwe i obejrzę na BBC Prime "Sędziego Deeda".
Mniam mniam
Pozdrawiam
MartaMaria

Cytat:
- Just what is wrong with you these days? You're wandering round in a
dream. - Perhaps he is in love. Is that right? Is the great senor
"marriage
is not for me" Dario actually smitten at last?
- Don't tease him Mercedes. I just think he has a lot on his mind.
- A lot of woman - his sister laughed. - Is that it? It would have to
be someone really special to knock my brother sideways like this!
A lot of woman. He certainly knew someone who fitted that description.

To chyba jednak nie o paniÂą duÂżych rozmiarów chodzi, tylko wÂłaÂśnie o to,
Âże owa pani jest kimÂś szczególnym...

- Po prostu ma mnóstwo spraw na gÂłowie.
- AÂż mu siĂŞ w gÂłowie krĂŞci. Czy to o to chodzi? Tylko ktoÂś wyjÂątkowy mógÂł
tak zawróciĂŚ w gÂłowie mojemu bratu.
KtoÂś wyjÂątkowy. To prawda, znaÂł osobĂŞ, do której pasowaÂło to okreÂślenie.

A teraz przepraszam, ale czekajÂą na mnie belki tĂŞczowe z ukrzyÂżowaniami.

Hania

In medieval rich people were seeking for wife or husband. They were looking
on portraits and choosing a wife.
Nowadays, people can use technical inventions, just like the Internet.
People are choosing other people on the chat. It's very easy. You just have
to write your nick-name and talk with a girl or a boy. And this may cause a
virtual love. In the Internet there are a matrimonial agencies, for example
U-Love.com and Match.com. They may help you finding your second half. When
you look the way that makes somebody interested in closer relationship with
you, all you need to do is to write this person an e-mail.
Unfortunately, there are also cheaters on the Net. Women and children have
to be careful.There are people called "net-rapists" and you can to be
sexually harrasted.

You mustn't reveal your home address, neither credit card number, bank
[account?] information and other personal details.

tam nigdzie Âżadnego gÂłupstwa... Niech ktoÂś to lepiej sprawdzi jeszcze... :)

A ja bym to tak:

In medieval age rich people were seeking for a wife or a husband by looking
on their portraits and choosing a wife (a co sie stalo z husband?).
Nowadays, people can use technical inventions, just like the Internet.
People choose other people on the chat. It's very easy. You just have
to write your nick-name and talk with a girl or a boy. And this can result
in a
virtual love. On the Internet there are matrimonial agencies, for example
U-Love.com and Match.com. They may help you find your better half. When
you find somebody interesting you just send this person an e-mail.
Unfortunately, there are also cheaters on the internet. Women and children
have
to be careful. There are people called "net-rapists" and you can be
sexually harassed.

Never reveal your home address, credit card number, bank account information
and other personal details.

Looking for my answer, migotka? Here it be:

Cytat:Ja jestem powazną i bardzo dobrze wykształconą Pania w srednim wieku

"She takes just like a woman..."

Cytat:i niezwyklam żeby ktos w taki niegrzeczny sposób mnie krytykowal,

"... but she breaks just like a little girl".

pozdrawiam
K. (*solo on harmonijce tutaj*)

Kilka drobiazdzków. Jak cos jeszcze odszukam lepszego, to nie
omieszkam:

Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.

An opinion is a vulgarity, even when it's not sincere. Every sincerity
is an intolerance. There are no sincere liberal minds. There are, for
that matter, no liberal minds.
- Fernando Pessoa

A small town is a place where there's no place to go where you
shouldn't
-- Burt Bacharach

głowie przewodni motyw muzyczny, czyli stary standard pt. Lola. Jak
wiadomo, film dzieje sie w Islandii, gdzie w dysfunkcjonalnej rodzinie
złożonej z samotnej matki 30-letniego wałkonia (nie chce mu się
pracować, całe dnie spędza onanizując się przed kasetą z kursem
aerobiku) pojawia się nagle Lola, czyli Victoria Abril. I wszystko się
zmienia. Na lepsze? Na inne.

I met her in a club down in old Soho
Where you drink champagne and it tastes just like cherry-cola
She walked up to me and she asked me to dance
I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said Lola
Lololololololollllla...

Well I'm not the world's most physical guy
But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh my Lola, Lololololololollllla...

Well I'm not dumb but I can't understand
Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man
Oh my Lola, Lololololololollllla...

Well we drank champagne and danced all night
Under electric candlelight she picked me up and sat me on her knee
And said dear boy won't you come home with me?
Well I'm not the world's most passionate guy
But when I looked in her eyes well I almost fell for my Lola
Oh my Lola, Lololololololollllla...

Well I'm not the world's most masculine man
But I know what I am and I'm glad I'm a man
And so is Lola
Oh my Lola, Lololololololollllla...

Gdzie, kurna, można kupić soundtrack do tego filmu? I skoro już przy tym
jestem, do filmów Moodysona?

Cytat:tak chodzi. Jeżeli wysyłam lub odbieram poczte z Outlooka to nie przechodzi

autentyfikacja użytkownika. Hasła są pobierane trzymane w /etc/shadow.
Uruchamiam deamona saslauthd -a shadow przy starcie.

Cytat:
discordia# ps -auwx | grep sasl
root 696 0,0 0,2 1432 616 ?? Ss 16Lip04 0:00,35
/usr/local/sbin/saslauthd -a pam
root 700 0,0 0,2 1432 776 ?? S 16Lip04 0:00,26
/usr/local/sbin/saslauthd -a pam
root 702 0,0 0,2 1432 784 ?? S 16Lip04 0:00,36
/usr/local/sbin/saslauthd -a pam
root 703 0,0 0,2 1432 764 ?? S 16Lip04 0:00,34
/usr/local/sbin/saslauthd -a pam
root 704 0,0 0,2 1432 616 ?? S 16Lip04 0:00,48
/usr/local/sbin/saslauthd -a pam
sasl ci chodzi?
--

She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Norrington, just
like she promised. And you get to die for her, just like you promised. So
we're all men of our word really... except for Elizabeth, who is in fact, a
woman.
-- Pirates of the Caribbean

--
Wysłano z serwisu OnetNiusy: http://niusy.onet.pl

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Marek:

Why do you and other Polish men have so much resentment of an American
man wanting to meet a Polish woman. I remember while in Poland I could
see resentful looks from the men. They knew I was American just by the
way I walked and carried myself. I want to meet a Polish woman beause
Polish women are nice. Do you know how much American women SUCK? Do you
have any idea? It is not that they are fat or anything like that, they
just SUCK. You must think I am a typical American that thinks of America
as the center of the universe. I am not. I have a gret understanding of
Poland and Polish people. Even though Poland is much more of a friend to
the USA, I see that as usual, Polish people like to bash Americans. Is
it so hard for your ego that an American man wants to meet one of "your"
women? If you want you can get mad and insult me. I will completely
understand your anger but all I am trying to do is what I think is best
for my life!

Cytat:Witam,
pozdrawiam. Moze to nie ta grupa, ale nurtuje male pytanie wiec
zaryzykuje -
dlaczego w piosenkach (np. Elton John "This train DON'T stop there
anymore",
Jenifer Lopez "Love DON'T cost a thing" itp.) w 3ciej osobie liczby
pojedynczej (train, love) jest DON'T a nie - jak mnie uczono w liceum -
DOESN'T?
Wielkie dzieki z gory.
Iza.

Tylko kilka procent populacji mówi perfekcyjnie poprawnym angielskim. Reszta
mówi językiem znacznie różniącym sie od "standardowego", a więc stosuje
"double negative" a nawet "multiple negative" [I can't find nothing nowhere
with no-one] oraz w 3 os. l. poj. przeczenie "don't"!!!
A już NA PEWNO jest to norma w piosenkach! Oto kilka cytatów:
The Beatles:
"She's got the ticket to ride and she DON'T care"
He just do what he please [Come Together]
He wear no shoeshine [Come Together]
He say: I know you ...[Come Together]
And if somebody loved me like she do me, oh she do me [Don't Let Me Down]
My love don't give me presents... [She's a Woman]
She don't give boys the eye [She's a Woman]
Phil Collins "Love don't come easy"
etc.

Pozdrawiam
Janusz

Cytat:| yes, my complex mind.
| That's complexed, Jacek. Complexed.
no,complex means developed not complexed.

Well, I didn't expect you to admit to it.

Cytat:| First you tell me you have a house and now it turns out it's an
apartment.
Jak dlugo siedzisz w real estate business ?

Since I was born.

Cytat:| Maybe on closer examination it'll turn out to be a student room or a shed
in
| someone's garden.
Wiem, a tego nie kupisz i marny ze mnie klient ;-(

It all depends on price. I'll even buy a shed if it's a good one at a low
price.

Cytat:| ze jestes Madam
| plci zenskiej, feministka, studentka filologii angielskiej
| Jezeli sie system pomylik to nie odpisuj .
| Pozdrowienia
| dla Miss David
| Again and again this misogynist keeps on attacking women.
| He doesn't even realise he's doing it.
Of course, you're wrong. Only w woman, can say so ;-)

Who's w woman? Wonder woman? I remember that Linda Carter.

Cytat:
| What's the matter Jacek? You can tell David.
| David, like I care.
;-)

Odpowiedziales, czyli system sie nie pomylil.

You're just using that cheap playground stunt to get the last word.
Okay, you can have it, little man, if it means so much to you.
From now on I'm stopping talking to you in disgust.

My twin brother will have to carry on from here.
His name's David too.

";-)", indeed.

bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful
woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken
of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the
Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is
ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the
lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body
explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield
inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's
evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan
steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?
--------------
BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your
muscular physique.
eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me again.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report
your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you f*ck up.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something

Pozdrawiam.

Skonczylem wlasnie napisy do "Cztery wesela i pogrzeb",
ale brakuje mi kilku kwestii. Dlatego jakby ktos mogl zaproponowac
tlumaczenie podanych fragmentow:

When you work in the money markets,|what use is Wordsworth, eh?

Because most of the blokes I fancy think l'm stupid and pointless, so they
just bonk me and then leave me,
and the kind of blokes that do fancy me,|I think are drips.
I can't even be bothered to bonk them,
which does sort of leave me|a bit nowhere.
What's bonking?

It's right up there with my father's|funeral for sheer entertainment value.

Anyway, I reckon l've had my fair run at it.
What is a fair run these days,|down your way?
I don't know.
More than one.

1 2 through 17, the university years. Sensitive, caring, intelligent boys.
Sexually speaking, a real low patch
(co to jest to "a real low patch")

Tonight, these are your orders.
Go forth and conjugate.|Find husbands and wives.
(jak przetlumaczyc "Go forth and conjugate")

Excellent. What do you think, Fifi?|Spot a potential hubby? (Spot a
potential hubby? )

First of all, l'd like to thank all of you who've flown in from the States.
As for the rest of you, l'd have thought that lots of frightful Americans
flying in was an excuse for staying away.

Now, my lords, ladies, and gentlemen, Sir Hamish Banks.
Anyone involved in politics for the last 20 years
has got used to being upstaged by a woman.
However, I must also say that l'm quite happy
to be upstaged by this woman for the rest of my life
(co to znaczy upstage? )

Is that some barracking at the back?|

Pick your favourite of his waistcoats|and remember him that way.
The most splendid, replete, big-hearted
- weak-hearted, as it turned out -
and jolly bugger most of us ever met

Put crepe bows round the white necks|of the public doves

and therefore is not by any to be enterprised
nor taken in hand unadvisedly,|lightly, or wantonly,
but reverently, discreetly, advisedly,
soberly, and in the fear of God. (mowa ksiĂŞdza)

Comes a point when you can't get wetter

I to by byÂło na wszystko. Za wszelka pomoc dziekuje.

Pozdrawiam
chucky

Zgodnie z listą. Wydanie z bonusem (dodatkowe 9 kawałków)
Dodam jeszcze, że poszukuję Quintessence, jeśli ktoś ma to poprosze -
format obojętny.

-------------------------------------------------------------------
Lenny Kravitz - Are You Gonna Go My Way
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Artist...............: Lenny Kravitz
Album................: Are You Gonna Go My Way
Source...............: NMR
Year.................:
Ripper...............: NMR
Codec................: Monkey's Audio (APE)
Version..............: 3.97
Quality..............: High, (avg. bitrate: 60 %kbps)
Channels.............: Stereo / 44100 hz / 16 bit
APE-Tag..............: 1á000

Ripped by............: NMR

Included.............: NFO, MD5, PLS, M3U

-------------------------------------------------------------------
Tracklisting
-------------------------------------------------------------------

01. (03:34) Lenny Kravitz - Are You Gonna Go My Way
02. (04:56) Lenny Kravitz - Believe
03. (03:56) Lenny Kravitz - Come On And Love Me
04. (03:13) Lenny Kravitz - Heaven Help
05. (03:50) Lenny Kravitz - Just Be A Woman
06. (03:42) Lenny Kravitz - Is There Any Love In Your Heart
07. (03:46) Lenny Kravitz - Black Girl
08. (03:55) Lenny Kravitz - My Love
09. (04:00) Lenny Kravitz - Sugar
10. (07:06) Lenny Kravitz - Sister
11. (04:53) Lenny Kravitz - Eleutheria
12. (03:48) Lenny Kravitz - Ascension
13. (04:19) Lenny Kravitz - Brother
14. (03:58) Lenny Kravitz - Heaven Help (acoustic)
15. (04:15) Lenny Kravitz - Someone Like You
16. (06:25) Lenny Kravitz - All My Life
17. (07:17) Lenny Kravitz - Sister (live)
18. (03:40) Lenny Kravitz - For the First Time
19. (04:08) Lenny Kravitz - Believe (acoustic)

Playing Time.........: 84:50
Total Size...........: 508,59 MB

NFO generated on.....: 2004-07-20 10:45:41

Oryginal info:
"The bonus disc was posted here for me awhile back, apparently
it was only available with the vinyl version of the album. Hope you
enjoy it, I know I do :-)

Slimbo

More Lenny Kravitz (01 of 26) yEnc - Are You Gonna Go My Way - 01 Are

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"No. It sounds like I don't seek to settle things down with anybody in
special, after all this time. I'm a film writer and director. To me, F.
Manolo is just a character, not a weapon I can throw against the Catholic
Church -it's got plenty of issues already. If my aim were to criticize the
clergy, all I'd need to do is to recall the recent statements pronounced
regarding violence at home. To say that the women's liberation of the
sixties accounts for today's murders in the hands of husbands is one of the
greatest insults I've heard for women. And, if bishops feel confident enough
to say these kinds of things, that's because they find it suitable in the
current political atmosphere. But that's a different subject, a serious
one -it does worry me, but falls into a different field from the "La mala
educación" press book.

I didn't create F. Manolo and its reflection Mr Berenguer as a means of
offence against the church -they are just elements that help me deals with
two of the multiple sides of passion. When F. Manolo is interpreted by
Daniel Gimenez Cacho, the passion he feels for the boy and his harassment
make n executioner out of him. When he turns into Mr Berenguer and falls in
love with Juan, the very same terrible character plays the opposite role in
the passion roulette -he becomes the victim now."

(Pedro Almodovar)

IMHO nie warto patrzec na wszystko przez pryzmat antyklerykalizmu, bo to
jeden z wielce ograniczajacych i dosc nienawistnych tuneli rzeczywistosci.
Poza tym traci sie wtedy cala mase wrazen estetyczno-artystycznych. :-)
Doszukujac sie atakow na Kosciol Rzymski tam gdzie ich specjalnie nie ma,
taki antyklerykal dla mnie nie rozni sie niczym od gosci z LPR niszczacych
dziela sztuki, ktore im jawia sie jako antykatolickie.

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will
probably never be able to support you.

Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand
closer to the kitchen sink.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me . . ."

How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.

Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't keep her mouth shut long enough to build up
the required pressure.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is
yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman that won't do what she's told.

I married Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.

I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months:
I don't like to interrupt her.

What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her intelligence?
Divorced.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's
sex drive by 90%. It's called a Wedding Cake.

Marriage is a 3-ring circus:
Engagement Ring, Wedding Ring, Suffering.

Our last fight was my fault:
My wife asked me "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!"

In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.

A beggar walked up to a well-dressed woman shopping on Rodeo
Drive and said, "I haven't eaten anything in four days."
She looked at him and said, "God, I wish I had your willpower."

Young Son: "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of
Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Dad: That happens in every country, son.

A man inserted an advertisement in the classified: "Wife
Wanted." The next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: You can have mine."

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to
forget it once.

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the
street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are
beautiful.

Z sowinistycznym pozdrowieniem ;)
Niech Âżyje solidarnoÂśĂŚ siusiaków :)
JW

Moze tych kilka propozycji przyda sie aby troche pomeczy studentow:

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the
union of a deaf man to a blind woman. -Samuel Taylor Coleridge,

One who condones evils is just as guilty as the one who perpetrates it. -
Dr. Martin Luther King

No man should judge unless he asks himself in absolute honesty whether in a
similar situation he might not have done the same. -Viktor Frankl, author,

The best educated human being is the one who understands most about the life
in which he is placed. -Helen Keller

The covers of this book are too far apart. -Ambrose Bierce, reviewing a
book.

Even in the worm that crawls in the earth there glows a divine spark. When
you slaughter a creature, you slaughter God. -Isaac Bashevis Singer

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance. -Derek Bok

I do not hesitate to read ... all good books in translations. What is really
best in any book is translatable--any real insight or broad human sentiment.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen. -Ralph
Waldo Emerson

Many a man thinks he is buying pleasure, when he is really selling himself
to
it. -Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)

Books are the bees which carry the quickening pollen from one to another
mind. -James Russell Lowell (1819-1891)

No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself, and
another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may
be true. -Nathaniel Hawthorne

Language is an archeological vehicle... the language we speak is a whole
palimpsest of human effort and history. -Russell Hoban

Old books that have ceased to be of service should no more be abandoned than
should old friends who have ceased to give pleasure. -Peregrine Worsthorne

Fanaticism consists of redoubling your efforts when you have forgotten your
aim. -George Santayana

Hate is a dead thing. Who of you would be a tomb? -Kahlil Gibran

Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost
possible degree. -Ezra Pound

As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist. -Indira Gandhi

This time, like all times, is a very good one, if we but know what to do
with
it. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

More ?
Pozdrawiam
Wieslaw Landowski

Cytat:Oto pewna wariacja oryginaÂłu tego tekstu, gdzie kaÂżde zdanie zawiera sÂłowo
"fuck":
"What the fuck was that"........................Mayor of Hiroshima
"Look at all those fucking Indians".............General Custer
"Where the fuck's all the water coming from"....Captain of the Titanic
"That's not a fucking gun"......................John Lennon
"The fucking throttle's stuck!".................Geoff Back
"Sleep, who needs fucking sleep ?"..............Geoff Back
"Reading, its only fucking 60 miles away !".....Geoff Back
"Where the fuck did that central reservation
come from ???"...........................Geoff Back
"Who's going to fucking know"...................President Nixon
"Head's are going to fucking roll"..............Anne Boleyn
"Who let that fucking woman drive"..............Space shuttle captain
"Watch him, he'll have some fucker's eye out"...King Harold
"I thought I could smell fucking petrol"........Nikki lauda
"What fucking map"..............................Mark Thatcher
"She's just a fucking secretary"................Cecil Parkinson
"Any fucker can understand that"................Einstein
"It fucking looks like her".....................Picasso
"What fucking log"..............................Richard Branson
"What the fuck do you mean I'm forever
blowing bubbles"........................Michael Jackson
"How the fuck do you work that out".............Pythagorus
"You want what on the fucking ceiling"..........Michaelangelo
"Fuck-a-duck"...................................Walt disney
"Why ? - because its fucking there".............Edmund Hilary
"I didn't want to fucking go anyway"............Seb Coe
"Just a fucking wall"...........................Peter Elliot
"I don't suppose its fucking raining"...........Joan of Arc
"What a way to make a fucking living"...........Cynthia Payne
"Who gives a fuck what its name is".............Elizabeth II
"I haven't got a fucking clue"..................Miss Marple
"Scattered showers my fucking arse".............Noah
"Armada, what the fuck is an armada"............Sir Francis Drake

Jeszcze bylo:
"I need this trip to Dallas like a fucking hole in my head" - JFK
- Szwejk

Listen you prick ! I tried to be quiet ,but not anymore ! you are very lucky that
you were talking to very nice and polite people ! But i am definitely not one of
them ! so here is what i want you to know : YOU STUPID FUCK BETTER STOP ALL THIS
LIE !
YOU ARE REALLY LUCKY THAT I CAN'T GET CLOSER TO YOU !! I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE SO
MANY BASTARDS STILL HATE US ! WHAT REALLY MAKES ME HAPPY IS WHEN THEY SHOWS THEIR
REAL FACES , SO WE WILL BE ALWAYS READY TO MEET THEM !
To All good people : I am really SORRY about "F" word i said , just
couldn't find any other for this punk

Cytat:

| Notice that supporters of the Christkillers can not answer the
| questions, or respond to points, so they try ad hominem attacks.
| History has shown that far too many of the murderers of Christ, and
| their followers, have been involved in one disaster after another, up
| to and including communism...

| | ATTENTION SUSAN COHEN:
| | OK, so I am now reading so many of your posts that I think to myself-
| And you shoud've kept to yourself whatever you were thinking. Mark Twain had
| a good advice to the trolls like yourself: "It is better to keep quiet and
| look intelligent then open your mouth and remove all doubts." :)
| | etah zhenzchinah/this woman has incredible amount hate and anger, enough
| | hate in her to start war.
| Another well known tactic, the lame hatemongers like you are so fond of:
| "Substitute the lack of arguments with the character assassination"
| | If you don't relax and lighten up little bit, Susan Cohen, I afraid you
| | get high blood pressure. Really I think real problem is you can't find
| | man.
| Lame, lame...
| | Mozhet bit, maybe you is old maid woman who is very angry at whole
| | world. You need consult with our wise advisor on this site- his name is
| | Panikovsky. You look for his name on posts and read his website. He
| | has help for women like you Susan.
| Did you use his help as well? :)
| | Who has time to write so many posts like you Susan? Also on this day,
| | which is big day for Jews holiday - the Passover. But you home alone
| | writing hate mail. What sad life you have. But Panikovsky can help you.
| | There is hope for you to become happy nice woman someday. Then we
| | all not think of you as arrogant bitch.
| | I. Petrenko
| Crawl back into your hole, loser
| [File: C:Program FilesNetscapefiles100MILLIONS.TXT]

niby zart, ale warto przemyslec :)))

I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a

Cytat:female driver cut right in
front of a pickup truck causing him to have to drive on
to the shoulder to avoid
hitting her. This evidently angered the driver enough
that he hung his arm out
his window and flipped the woman off. "Man, that guy is
stupid" I thought to
myself.
I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner
whenever a female does
anything to me in traffic and here's why: I drive 48
miles each way every day to
work, that's 96 miles each day. Of these, 16 miles each
way is bumper-to-bumper.
Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway so
if you just look at the
7 lanes I am not in, that means I pass something like a
new car every 40 feet
per lane.
That's 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works
out to be 982 cars every
mile, or 31,424 cars. Even though the rest of the 32
miles is not bumper to
bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That
brings the number to something like 36,000 cars I pass
every day.
Statistically, half of these are driven by females,
that's 18,000. In any
given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS. That's 642.
According to Cosmopolitan,
70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or
unrewarding. That's 449.
According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of
all females have seriously
considered suicide or homicide. That's 98. And 34%
describe men as their biggest
problem. That's 33.
According to the National Rifle Association 5% of all
females carry weapons
and this number is increasing. That means that EVERY
SINGLE DAY, I drive past at
least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men
are her biggest problem,
has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS,
and is armed. Flip one
off?
I think not.

Cytat:Dlaczego you fuck wits produkujecie sie po angielsku

unknowing self-parodies are seldom as hilariously dead-on as
yours. not only do you manage to be vulgar and throw ad-
hominems, but you manage to be vulgar and throw ad-hominems in
the very english language that you so decry.

are you familiar with jacques derrida's wonderful book "of
grammatology" ? he cogently argues that philosophical
criticisms of writing "deconstruct themselves" (unravel like a
cheaply made sweater) because they themselves can only be put
forth in writing. the remainder of this analogy, and its praxis
with respect to your post, is left as an exercise to the reader.

Cytat:na polskiej liscie

the woman who was just here cleaning my apartment regularly
speaks the spanish language within the borders of the united
states. do you think i should reprimand her?

by the way, if i keep speaking english, will you take away my
polish citizenship? please? pretty please?

Cytat:do tego bedac Polakami?

and people like you sometimes make me regret it. it is nice to
know, however, that there are many good, open-minded folk here
on this group who happen to have been born in the same country
as i.

Cytat:Jesli macie jakis problem to olejcie ten kraj raz na zawsze i
zyjcie sobie spokojnie w swoich wlasnych rajach na ziemi.

did that already, thanks, as have millions of others. by the
way, are you of the belief that one should never criticize one's
country? because the united states is my country, which i love
dearly, and yet i criticize it all the time. boy am i glad that
americans who think like you are few & far between. oh, and if
one is never to criticize one's country, exactly how are things
supposed to improve?

time to get my fat american ass over to starbucks and quaff a
nice frothy latte...

best regards to all
kas

-----------------------------------------------------------

Got questions? Get answers over the phone at Keen.com.
Up to 100 minutes free!
http://www.keen.com

Masz kompleksy facet?

Cytat:----- Original Message -----

Sent: Friday, June 30, 2000 4:10 AM
Subject: Re: "Draft evader" going back to Poland?
| Dlaczego you fuck wits produkujecie sie po angielsku
unknowing self-parodies are seldom as hilariously dead-on as
yours. not only do you manage to be vulgar and throw ad-
hominems, but you manage to be vulgar and throw ad-hominems in
the very english language that you so decry.
are you familiar with jacques derrida's wonderful book "of
grammatology" ? he cogently argues that philosophical
criticisms of writing "deconstruct themselves" (unravel like a
cheaply made sweater) because they themselves can only be put
forth in writing. the remainder of this analogy, and its praxis
with respect to your post, is left as an exercise to the reader.
| na polskiej liscie
the woman who was just here cleaning my apartment regularly
speaks the spanish language within the borders of the united
states. do you think i should reprimand her?
by the way, if i keep speaking english, will you take away my
polish citizenship? please? pretty please?
| do tego bedac Polakami?
and people like you sometimes make me regret it. it is nice to
know, however, that there are many good, open-minded folk here
on this group who happen to have been born in the same country
as i.
| Jesli macie jakis problem to olejcie ten kraj raz na zawsze i
| zyjcie sobie spokojnie w swoich wlasnych rajach na ziemi.
did that already, thanks, as have millions of others. by the
way, are you of the belief that one should never criticize one's
country? because the united states is my country, which i love
dearly, and yet i criticize it all the time. boy am i glad that
americans who think like you are few & far between. oh, and if
one is never to criticize one's country, exactly how are things
supposed to improve?
time to get my fat american ass over to starbucks and quaff a
nice frothy latte...
best regards to all
kas
-----------------------------------------------------------
Got questions? Get answers over the phone at Keen.com.
Up to 100 minutes free!
http://www.keen.com

--
Archiwum listy dyskusyjnej pl-soc-prawo
http://www.newsgate.pl/archiwum/pl-soc-prawo/

Cytat:
Pan ZHID Levinson, we are not discussing what happened in the 1400's,
buth rather what happened around only 60 years ago!!

Fine. 60-odd years ago, "people" with names like Schmidt were raping
Polish women, beating and shooting Polish priests, monks, and nuns, and
shoving Poles into gas chambers and crematoria (your ancestors from
Teutonia would have been delighted). They also abused and murdered
Russian prisoners of war and slaughtered Russian civilians (sort of like
your Teutonic ancestors in Pskov, before they had to deal with ARMED
Russians under Alexander Nevsky-- then they sang a different tune, like
"Mercy, Russians!").

You people got together with Stalin to jump Poland from both sides, two
big countries against one little country. But the Poles were far braver
than you thought. In fact, a Polish horse cavalry charge cut up a German
armored unit pretty thoroughly. The Germans were begging for mercy under
the onslaught of Polish horse cavalry! (This may well have been
history's last effective charge by horse cavalry. I thought it was
Omdurman in 1898, then someone directed me to Aqaba during WW I, but now
I find one in 1939.)

Then you betrayed your Russian "allies" in Operation Barbarossa. Your
boy Hitler thought the Russians were subhuman, and he ordered that
German superment were not to retreat from them. So he threw away half a
million of his blonde, blue-eyed Ubermenschen at Stalingrad: what a laugh!

Cytat:
Just like a ZHID, to try and distort the topic under discussion.
Concentrate Pan ZHID on the years of the 1900's, when most of us can
remember and give personal details of the oppression under the ZHID
bootheels of the NKVD/KGB and their civil administrators - all ZHIDS,
who oppressed us!!

The "Zhids," as you call them, were oppressed by Stalin's government.
Jews were second-class citizens under Soviet domination; why do you
think so many of them fled the country and went to Israel or the U.S.?
The Soviets didn't treat Poles very well either. Come to think of it, if
your boy Hitler had treated the Poles decently, they might have fought
the Russians. The Ukrainians were, in fact, willing to do just that
(noting that Hitler had murdered seven million of them) until Hitler
began to treat them as Slavic "Untermenschen."

I bet that, if you had been a Pole, you would have collaborated with the
Nazis and Soviets, just like Hetman Janusz Radziwill did with the
Swedes. You would have made a fine Quisling!

--Bill
http://www.omdurman.org/leaflets/hussar.html Be an Internet Hussar,
defend Civilization from militant "Islam!"

Kiedy¶ ³azi³em po sieci i bra³em co by³o, wiêc to mam:

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02 - Ian Dury & The Blockheads - Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick.flac
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02 - Waitresses - I Know What Boys Like.flac
03 - Kim Wilde - Kids In America.flac
04 - Haircut One Hundred - Love Plus One.flac
05 - Marshall Crenshaw - Someday, Someway.flac
06 - Great Buildings - Hold On To Something.flac
07 - The Jam - Town Called Malice.flac
08 - Tommy Tutone - 867-5309 (Jenny).flac
09 - Go-Go's - Vacation.flac
10 - Frank & Moon Zappa - Valley Girl.flac
11 - A Flock Of Seagulls - I Ran (So Far Away).flac
12 - Soft Cell - Sex Dwarf.flac
13 - Gang Of Four - I Love A Man In A Uniform.flac
14 - Japan - The Art Of Parties.flac
15 - Pete Shelley - Homosapien.flac
16 - Toni Basil - Mickey.flac

w sumie 5 CD i 1.92 GB ale jak bĂŞdÂą chĂŞtni
to jakoÂś to przepchnĂŞ :)

b

Tak na marginesie dyskusji z Kolega Hare (ja tez bylem
Kanadyjczykiem, ale tylko 6 miesicecy, po czym salwowalem sie
ucieczka):

"July 19 - 2004
Hi everyone....
I have just discovered this page, and I have felt identified with
the postings about the labour situation in Canada.

I'm a Tourism professional from Spain, fortunately I have had the
opportunity of living in different countries (including our American
neighbour) while advancing in my career. I always heard of how
different Canada was from the States, the public safety and social
protection in Canada.

Living in Europe, this is nothing special since we have a universal
free health care, which is paid with our salaries -nothing to
compare with the exaggerated rates in Canada) free education,
pension, unemployment insurance and career training for the
unemployed, and one month of vacations every year.

I must say that living in the States was an interesting experience.
I was lucky to work in the best city, San Francisco (the most
European, cosmopolitan, and cultural in the West). We worked hard,
but there were opportunities. It's true that foreigners had locked
contracts (they were not allowed to change to another company if
they had the H1 visa). I didn't feel discriminated because of being
a foreigner. Their motto is: If you are good, you could access any
where. Americans are pragmatic in their approach.

My contract in America ended, and I came to Canada because my
husband is Canadian. I have never been enthusiastic about moving
here. I arrived in BC last year, and there has not been a day I
haven't regretted the decision.

First, to get the migration procedures done from Canada. I couldn't
leave the country, get a work permit, study... Honestly, any pet had
more rights than myself. That was the first deception. Another one
was the weather, the rain, tedium, people in Vancouver are plain,
they are apathetic and on top of that they present Vancouver as one
of the best cities to live in... I ask to myself where do their
statistics come from? From the Tebeos?

Then I heard and learned about the labour market, which is just
"TERRIBLE." I had never been in a place where the expectations were
too dark. They asked me about having Canadian experience?????? How
special they think they are to not accept experience from other
countries. So, I volunteered in a BC association.

Finally, my work permit has arrived (in the middle of summer) at the
same time that my husband has lost his job. Now the level of stress
has been duplicated. If we add that I am a foreigner, a woman, and
without work experience in BC... what's left to me?

Of course I'm seriously planning not to pay more money to
immigration, which is abusive, bureaucratic, and low-efficient -they
complain a lot about their neighbour, but they must learn from their
efficiency- To get my residency... what for? To live a thousand
times worse that in the old Europe... to pay higher taxes and not
having a job... In my country this is called timo de la estampita
(robbery).

What have I learned?
* Canadian taxes are double those of my country.
* There is no free Health Care. You have to pay like in the USA.
*Attending university te cuesta un ojo de la cara y parte del otro1
Even in California, attending a College course is $50.00 compared to
$300.00 or $400.00 in Vancouver.
1This is a Spanish saying used to remark that it's extremely
expensive, which can be roughly translated as "It costs you an eye
and part of the other one."

* There is an unemployment rate of 7% while in California is 4%.
* I have as much public safety as in any part of Europe, with the
difference that in Europe there is CULTURE, something that residents
of Vancouver haven't seen yet.
* Living in a province too provincial (sorry for the redundancy) is
going to kill my multicultural phase and good taste.

I feel depressed, deceived and robbed. My advice to all of you is to
think twice before coming here. Not everything that shines is gold,
nor Canada is "El Dorado." There are better countries, and if your
life is not at risk, I advice you to stay where you are...
Greetings from the end of the world.... Vancouver, BC
Elena.
Ps.. BTW please send me some information if some of you know about
companies that are currently hiring..."

Wziete z

http://www.canadaimmigrants.com/forum.asp

P.Z.

No nareszcie udalo sie Panu wstrzelic w temat bez zbednych opini, i to
jeszcze tylko cytujac !!!!!

Cytat:Tak na marginesie dyskusji z Kolega Hare (ja tez bylem
Kanadyjczykiem, ale tylko 6 miesicecy, po czym salwowalem sie
ucieczka):
"July 19 - 2004
Hi everyone....
I have just discovered this page, and I have felt identified with
the postings about the labour situation in Canada.
I'm a Tourism professional from Spain, fortunately I have had the
opportunity of living in different countries (including our American
neighbour) while advancing in my career. I always heard of how
different Canada was from the States, the public safety and social
protection in Canada.
Living in Europe, this is nothing special since we have a universal
free health care, which is paid with our salaries -nothing to
compare with the exaggerated rates in Canada) free education,
pension, unemployment insurance and career training for the
unemployed, and one month of vacations every year.
I must say that living in the States was an interesting experience.
I was lucky to work in the best city, San Francisco (the most
European, cosmopolitan, and cultural in the West). We worked hard,
but there were opportunities. It's true that foreigners had locked
contracts (they were not allowed to change to another company if
they had the H1 visa). I didn't feel discriminated because of being
a foreigner. Their motto is: If you are good, you could access any
where. Americans are pragmatic in their approach.
My contract in America ended, and I came to Canada because my
husband is Canadian. I have never been enthusiastic about moving
here. I arrived in BC last year, and there has not been a day I
haven't regretted the decision.
First, to get the migration procedures done from Canada. I couldn't
leave the country, get a work permit, study... Honestly, any pet had
more rights than myself. That was the first deception. Another one
was the weather, the rain, tedium, people in Vancouver are plain,
they are apathetic and on top of that they present Vancouver as one
of the best cities to live in... I ask to myself where do their
statistics come from? From the Tebeos?
Then I heard and learned about the labour market, which is just
"TERRIBLE." I had never been in a place where the expectations were
too dark. They asked me about having Canadian experience?????? How
special they think they are to not accept experience from other
countries. So, I volunteered in a BC association.
Finally, my work permit has arrived (in the middle of summer) at the
same time that my husband has lost his job. Now the level of stress
has been duplicated. If we add that I am a foreigner, a woman, and
without work experience in BC... what's left to me?
Of course I'm seriously planning not to pay more money to
immigration, which is abusive, bureaucratic, and low-efficient -they
complain a lot about their neighbour, but they must learn from their
efficiency- To get my residency... what for? To live a thousand
times worse that in the old Europe... to pay higher taxes and not
having a job... In my country this is called timo de la estampita
(robbery).
What have I learned?
* Canadian taxes are double those of my country.
* There is no free Health Care. You have to pay like in the USA.
*Attending university te cuesta un ojo de la cara y parte del otro1
Even in California, attending a College course is Â¤50.00 compared to
Â¤300.00 or Â¤400.00 in Vancouver.
1This is a Spanish saying used to remark that it's extremely
expensive, which can be roughly translated as "It costs you an eye
and part of the other one."
* There is an unemployment rate of 7% while in California is 4%.
* I have as much public safety as in any part of Europe, with the
difference that in Europe there is CULTURE, something that residents
of Vancouver haven't seen yet.
* Living in a province too provincial (sorry for the redundancy) is
going to kill my multicultural phase and good taste.
I feel depressed, deceived and robbed. My advice to all of you is to
think twice before coming here. Not everything that shines is gold,
nor Canada is "El Dorado." There are better countries, and if your
life is not at risk, I advice you to stay where you are...
Greetings from the end of the world.... Vancouver, BC
Elena.
Ps.. BTW please send me some information if some of you know about
companies that are currently hiring..."
Wziete z
http://www.canadaimmigrants.com/forum.asp
P.Z.

---
Poczta wychodzaca wolna od wiusow !
Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).
Version: 6.0.736 / Virus Database: 490 - Release Date: 2004-08-09

AN OPEN LETTER TO BREAST-FEEDING MOTHERS

Over 200,000 American citizens have signed a petition urging Congress
to declare breast-feeding a crime. This primitive ritual has continued
to be a violation of babies' civil rights, an unlawful, incestuous
relationship with mothers that leads to moral decay.
Women who breast-feed enjoy an erotic experience that offensively
imposes oral gratification on innocent infants. This reprehensible act
teaches children illicit sex that subsequently manifests promiscuity,
homosexuality and addiction to cybersex.

CITIZENS AGAINST BREAST-FEEDING have conducted numerous surveys over
the past two years in twenty states documenting wide support for
condemning breast-feeding by law. A bare breast must not be an
invitation to commit a barbarian deed just because it produces milk.
There are pumps for this purpose and healthy formulas as a substitute.

My best friend is a single mother who has multiple orgasms while
breast-feeding her 18-month old son. She feels guilty for her sinful
behavior but is hooked on this sort of passion. Rosa would like to
terminate her sick relationship with Robbie, but she can't. A
therapist has tried to help by encouraging bottled milk. Also to
transfer her active libido towards a male adult. Rosa attempted
intercourse with an attractive stockbroker but she always failed to
reach climax. Only breast-feeding Robbie can sexually satisfy her.

I share Rosa's pain over her dilemma and the millions of other women
who automatically breast-feed without conscience. Rosa fears for
Robbie's future. Will he grow up to hate his mother's unbridled abuse
of his innocence? Will he become addicted to tobacco, drugs and
alchohol? Perhaps turn gay? It's a mind-boggling concern.

Breast-feeding must be banned by law, Americans. Please join our
crusade now. Don't just be a bystander to life, participate! If you
still have doubts, think about it. Animals breast-feed their offspring
by instinct. So do tribal natives in many countries. There are no 7-11
stores in the jungle. And it would cost billions to educate women in
third world countries.

However, in the United States of America we have the freedom and a
moral obligation to head off a catastrophy and heal humanity.
Otherwise the downward spiral into depravity, generated by
breast-feeding mothers, will infect generations of infants.

I believe in saving the earth and its environment. But I am more
concerned about the human race and its degeneration from
breast-feeding.

Remember: United we stand, divided we fall!

Very sincerely yours,

Tess Hennessy
Founder-Director
CITIZENS AGAINST BREAST-FEEDING

-- [pppoezja] --
Ani POMu, ani mÂłyna,
KrzyÂż, chaÂłupy i krowina --
Taka gmina.

nie sądziłam, że ktoś jeszcze docenia teksty Kurta a zwłłaszcza
tutaj!!!??

Cytat:

| | " Skrzydełka motyli "
| (...) poeci swiadomie powolywali
| sie **tworczo** na dawniejsze wiersze, pisali
| wariacje modyfikujace sytuacje, itp.
(...)
| Analogie nie tylko, ze nie odbieraja wierszom
| oryginalnosci, ale jeszcze poglebiaja ich
| odbior dla czytelnikow, ktorzy maja szczescie
| je odczuc, obiektywnie sa w stanie wiersz
| poglebic. Gdy sa harmonijne, to piekno wierszy
| z przeszlosci wzmacnia piekno wiersza-potomka.
Zgadzam się z Tobą Włodku.
Czasmi doskonały efekt osiąga się właśnie
przez odpowiednie modyfikacje "wierszy z przeszłości"
Powiedział bym nawet, że ostatnio czyni się to coraz
częściej.
Sam jednak wolał bym tego unikać. Wiem może
brzmi to dziwnie ale na razie będę upierał się
przy swoim.
| Z drugiej strony powinienem byl moze
| wspomniec, co wydawalo mmi sie oczywiste
| -- wiersz mozna np. odebrac jako
| indukowany halucynacjami narkotycznymi.
Oczywiście że tak. Ale jeżeli już przyjmie się takie
stanowisko to trzeba zdać sobie sprawę, że jeśli tekst
jest naprawdę " dobry " to nie jest to zasługa autora.
(Jego wkład był naprawdę niewielki w porównaniu z wkładem
samych "dragów")
Cała bowiem "sztuka" według mnie polega na "rozumowym"
tworzeniu abstrakcyjnych obrazów, nie będąc bezwolnym
demiurgiem wzorującym się na obrazach podsuwanych przez
najróżniejsze chemiczne tudzież "ekologiczne" środki
halucynogenne.
| W zeszlym roku mielismy serie
| takich wierszy na php, ale krotkich.
Chętnie zapoznał bym się z tymi wierszami.
A propos twórczości "pod wpływem..".
Parę lat temu natrafiłem na teksty Kurta Cobaina
I mimo, że słyszałem je wiele razy wcześniej w mediach
w formie piosenek "Nirwany" to jedynie wnikliwa analiza
dała możliwość wyczucia ich oryginalności.
Prawdę mówiąc. od dawna zastanawiam się jak wyglądał proces
twórczy ŚP. Kurta. Czy za każdym razem pomagał sobie czymś
czy po prostu był "tak zdolny"
Od razu zaznaczyć muszę, że tego rodzaju twórczość jest
mi całkiem obca jako "twórcy" i sam daleki jestem od pisania
podobnych kawałków. ( choć może czasami chciał bym )
Uważam jednak, że teksty te są "genialne" ( na swój sposób )
i nie można przejść obok nich obojętnie.
________
Przy okazji przesyłam cztery teksty ( songs actually )
Kurta Cobaina:
Wydają mi się warte tych kilku minut skupienia.
"Something In The Way"
Underneath the bridge
The tarp has sprung a leak
And the animals I've trapped
Have all become my pets
And I'm living off of grass
And the drippings from the ceiling
But it's ok to eat fish
Cause they haven't any feelings
Something in the way
"Come As You Are"
Come as you are, as you were,
As I want you to be
As a friend, as a friend, as an old enemy
Take your time, hurry up
The choice is your, don't be late
Take a rest as a friend as an old memoria
Come dowsed in mud, soaked in bleach
As I want you to be
As a trend, as a friend, as an old memoria
And I swear that I don't have a gun
No I don't have a gun
"Lithium"
I'm so happy because today
I've found my friends ...
They're in my head
I'm so ugly, but that's okay, cause so are you...
We've broken our mirrors
Sunday morning is everyday for all I care...
And I'm not scared
Light my candles in a daze...
Cause I've found god - hey, hey, hey
I'm so lonely but that's okay I shaved my head...
And I'm not sad
And just maybe I'm to blame for all I've heard...
But I'm not sure
I'm so excited, I can't wait to meet you there...
But I don't care
I'm so horny but that's okay...
My will is good - hey, hey, hey
I like it - I'm not gonna crack
I miss you - I'm not gonna crack
I love you - I'm not gonna crack
I kill you - I'm not gonna crack
"Territorial Pissings"
When I was an alien, cultures weren't opinions
Never met a wise man, if so it's a woman
Just because you're paranoid
Doesn't mean they're not after you
Gotta find a way to find a way when I'm there
Gotta find a way - a better way -
I had better wait
__________
P.S. If U like it . I can send You more at your priva.
Just let me know.
Thanks 4 everythin' !
Free Creator
""""""""""""

Cytat:
Moze tych kilka propozycji przyda sie aby troche pomeczy studentow:
The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the
union of a deaf man to a blind woman. -Samuel Taylor Coleridge,
One who condones evils is just as guilty as the one who perpetrates it. -
Dr. Martin Luther King
No man should judge unless he asks himself in absolute honesty whether in a
similar situation he might not have done the same. -Viktor Frankl, author,
The best educated human being is the one who understands most about the life
in which he is placed. -Helen Keller
The covers of this book are too far apart. -Ambrose Bierce, reviewing a
book.
Even in the worm that crawls in the earth there glows a divine spark. When
you slaughter a creature, you slaughter God. -Isaac Bashevis Singer
If you think education is expensive, try ignorance. -Derek Bok
I do not hesitate to read ... all good books in translations. What is really
best in any book is translatable--any real insight or broad human sentiment.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen. -Ralph
Waldo Emerson
Many a man thinks he is buying pleasure, when he is really selling himself
to
it. -Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
Books are the bees which carry the quickening pollen from one to another
mind. -James Russell Lowell (1819-1891)
No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself, and
another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may
be true. -Nathaniel Hawthorne
Language is an archeological vehicle... the language we speak is a whole
palimpsest of human effort and history. -Russell Hoban
Old books that have ceased to be of service should no more be abandoned than
should old friends who have ceased to give pleasure. -Peregrine Worsthorne
Fanaticism consists of redoubling your efforts when you have forgotten your
aim. -George Santayana
Hate is a dead thing. Who of you would be a tomb? -Kahlil Gibran
Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost
possible degree. -Ezra Pound
As long as a man stands in his own way, everything seems to be in his way.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist. -Indira Gandhi
This time, like all times, is a very good one, if we but know what to do
with
it. -Ralph Waldo Emerson
More ?
Pozdrawiam
Wieslaw Landowski

CóÂż za kolekcja! Na pewno wiele siĂŞ przyda. Podoba mi siĂŞ zwÂłaszcza to o
wyksztaÂłceniu (best educated man). NB. A skÂąd taki zbiór? JeÂżeli z
ksiÂąÂżki, to proszĂŞ o namiary. Jest sÂłownik przysÂłów, aforyzmów itp.
wydawnictwa Altravox, ale znajdujĂŞ tam niewiele cytatów, które mogĂŞ
wykorzystaĂŚ. DziĂŞkujĂŞ
Mariusz

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Status:

Dear Friend,

I presume that we have not met neither have we communicated before. Firstly,
my name is Mrs LINDA ONU, I am the wife of late MICHAEL ONU. My late husband
MICHAEL ONU who was a business tycoon based here in Nigeria was also the
chairman Executive Hills Hotels died last month at the age of 46 after a
brief illness at Eko Hospital here in Nigeria.

Could you believe that the tradition and costum of the town and state where
my late husband came from demands that any woman who does not have a male
child for the husband, that when ever the husband dies, all the properties
including cash will be shared among the late husband brothers and the woman
will be sent out the husband house for good.

My dear, this is exactly what I am going through right now since last month
my husband died. My late husband brothers has taken all the properties
belonging to my late husband including bank account and as well sent me out
of my husband house just because I do not have a male child for my late
husband. This is a weaked tradition and believe. As am taliking to you now,
I and my two daughters are going through hell at the moment.

Right now, I am having in my possition all the vital documents relating to
the sum of $9.5 million dollars which my late husband deposited with a bank
here with my name as the next of kin before his death. Last week I contacted
the manager of the bank and I was told that the money is very much intact,
that I can as well come for it any time I feel like.

Please remember that I cannot make use of this fund here due to forces
surounding me at the moment. Please have mercy at the poor widow like me and
help me out of this mess. All I want you to do for me is to provide me with
your account information so that I can direct my bank to transfer this fund
into your account immediately before my late husband brothers will have
knowledge of it and claim it just like the way they did to others. I
strongly believe that the only way I can secure this money for myself is to
act fast now and transfer this money overseas, that is the main reason why I
am contacting you for your assistance.

Please, as soon as this fund is transfered into your account, you can go
ahead and have 30% of the total amount while 70% will remain for me so that
I can be able to take care of my two children my late husband left behind
for me. Remember that my children are the only happiness I have here on
earth and I cannot watch them suffer like this.

I look forward to hearing from you immediately.

Sincerely,

MRS LINDA ONU.

Oto zestaw tekstow, ktore Bart Simpson wypisywal na tablicy na poczatku
kazdego odcinka The Simpsons:

- I will not waste chalk - moim zdaniem to jest najlepsze (zwlaszcza jesli

- I will not skateboard in the halls
- I will not burp in class
- I will not instigate revolution
- I will not draw naked ladies in class
- I did not see Elvis
- I will not call my teacher "Hot Cakes"
- Garlic gum is not funny
- They are laughing at me, not with me
- I will not yell "Fire" in a crowded classroom
- I will not encourage others to fly
- I will not fake my way through life
- Tar is not a plaything
- I will not Xerox my butt
- It's potato, not potatoe
- I will not trade pants with others
- I am not a 32 year old woman
- I will not do that thing with my tongue
- I will not drive the principal's car
- I will not pledge allegiance to Bart
- I will not sell school property
- I will not cut corners
- I will not get very far with this attitude
- I will not make flatuent noises in class
- I will not belch the National Anthem
- I will not sell land in Florida
- I will not grease the monkey bars
- I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment
- I will not do anything bad ever again
- I will not show off
- I will not sleep through my education
- I am not a dentist
- Spitwads are not free speech
- Nobody likes sunburn slappers
- High explosives and school don't mix
- I will not bribe Principal Skinner
- I will not squeak chalk
- I will finish what I sta...
- "Bart Bucks" are not legal tender
- Underwear should be worn on the inside
- The Christmas Pageant does not stink
- I will not torment the emotionally frail
- I will not carve gods
- I will not spank others
- I will not aim for the head
- I will not barf unless I'm sick
- I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty
- I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge
- I will not conduct my own fire drills
- Funny noises are not funny
- I will not snap bras
- I will not fake seizures
- This punishment is not boring and pointless
- My name is not Dr. Death
- I will not defame New Orleans
- I will not prescribe medication
- I will not bury the new kid
- I will not teach others to fly
- I will not bring sheep to class
- A burp is not an answer
- Teacher is not a leper
- Coffee is not for kids
- I will not eat things for money
- I will not yell "She's Dead" at roll call
- The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee
- I will not call the principal "spud head"
- Goldfish don't bounce
- Mud is not one of the 4 food groups
- No one is interested in my underpants
- I will not sell miracle cures
- I will return the seeing-eye dog
- I do not have diplomatic immunity
- I will not charge admission to the bathroom
- I will never win an Emmy
- The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy
- All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy
- I will not say "Springfield" just to get applause
- I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers
- My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man
- I will not go near the kindergarten turtle
- I am not deliciously saucy
- Organ transplants are best left to the professionals
- The Pledge of Allegiance does not end with Hail Satan
- I will not celebrate meaningless milestones
- There are plenty of businesses like show business
- I will not re-transmit without the express permission of Major League
Baseball
- Five days is not too long to wait for a gun
- Beans are neither fruit nor musical
- I will not use abbrev.
- I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr.

Sorki, ze po angielsku, ale nie chce mi sie (misie?) tego tlumaczyc, a
uwazam, ze niektore sa naprawde niezle.
KubiK

DziĂŞki wam, Random Word Generator i fonotaktyka to chyba to, z czego bĂŞdĂŞ
czerpaÂł.

Obiecane taksy:

Tax#1

Close-to-complete Ideology and Religion Shit List

* Taoism - Shit happens.
* Confucianism - Confucius say, "Shit happens."
* Buddhism - If shit happens, it isn't really shit.
* Zen Buddhism - Shit is, and is not.
* Zen Buddhism #2 - What is the sound of shit happening?
* Hinduism - This shit has happened before.
* Islam - If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.
* Islam #2 - If shit happens, kill the person responsible.
* Islam #3 - If shit happens, blame Israel.
* Catholicism - If shit happens, you deserve it.
* Protestantism - Let shit happen to someone else.
* Presbyterian - This shit was bound to happen.
* Episcopalian - It's not so bad if shit happens, as long as you serve the
right wine with it.
* Methodist - It's not so bad if shit happens, as long as you serve grape
juice with it.
* Congregationalist - Shit that happens to one person is just as good as
shit that happens to another.
* Unitarian - Shit that happens to one person is just as bad as shit that
happens to another.
* Lutheran - If shit happens, don't talk about it.
* Fundamentalism - If shit happens, you will go to hell, unless you are born
again. (Amen!)
* Fundamentalism #2 - If shit happens to a televangelist, it's okay.
* Fundamentalism #3 - Shit must be born again.
* Judaism - Why does this shit always happen to us?
* Calvinism - Shit happens because you don't work.

* Creationism - God made all shit.
* Secular Humanism - Shit evolves.
* Christian Science - When shit happens, don't call a doctor - pray!
* Christian Science #2 - Shit happening is all in your mind.
* Unitarianism - Come let us reason together about this shit.
* Quakers - Let us not fight over this shit.
* Utopianism - This shit does not stink.
* Darwinism - This shit was once food.
* Capitalism - That's MY shit.
* Communism - It's everybody's shit.
* Feminism - Men are shit.
* Chauvinism - We may be shit, but you can't live without us...
* Commercialism - Let's package this shit.
* Impressionism - From a distance, shit looks like a garden.
* Idolism - Let's bronze this shit.
* Existentialism - Shit doesn't happen; shit IS.
* Existentialism #2 - What is shit, anyway?
* Stoicism - This shit is good for me.
* Hedonism - There is nothing like a good shit happening!
* Mormonism - God sent us this shit.
* Mormonism #2 - This shit is going to happen again.
* Wiccan - An it harm none, let shit happen.
* Scientology - If shit happens, see "Dianetics", p.157.
* Jehovah's Witnesses - Knock< Knock< Shit happens.
* Jehovah's Witnesses #2 - May we have a moment of your time to show you
some of our shit?
* Jehovah's Witnesses #3 - Shit has been prophesied and is imminent; only
the righteous shall survive its happening.
* Moonies - Only really happy shit happens.
* Hare Krishna - Shit happens, rama rama.
* Rastafarianism - Let's smoke this shit!
* Zoroastrianism - Shit happens half on the time.
* Church of SubGenius - BoB shits.
* Practical - Deal with shit one day at a time.
* Agnostic - Shit might have happened; then again, maybe not.
* Agnostic #2 - Did someone shit?
* Agnostic #3 - What is this shit?
* Satanism - SNEPPAH TIHS.
* Atheism - What shit?
* Atheism #2 - I can't believe this shit!
* Nihilism - No shit.
* Alcoholics Anonymous - Shit happens-one day at a time!

Tax#2
GEORGE BUSH : Po zmianie kolejnoÂści liter : HE BUGS GORE
DORMITORY - DIRTY ROOM
EVANGELIST - EVIL'S AGENT
PRESBYTERIAN - BEST IN PRAYER
DESPERATION - A ROPE ENDS IT
THE MORSE CODE - HERE COME DOTS
SLOT MACHINES - CASH LOST IN ME
ANIMOSITY - IS NO AMITY
MOTHER-IN-LAW - WOMAN HITLER
SNOOZE ALARMS - ALAS! NO MORE Z'S
A DECIMAL POINT - I'M A DOT IN PLACE
THE EARTHQUAKES - THAT QUEER SHAKE
ELEVEN PLUS TWO - TWELVE PLUS ONE
PRESIDENT CLINTON OF THE USA - TO COPULATE HE FINDS INTERNS

Tax#3
Pilot helikoptera do kontroli podejÂścia: "Tak, jestem 3000 stóp nad namiarem
Cubla."
Drugi gÂłos na tej samej czĂŞstotliwoÂści: "NIE! Nie moÂżesz! Ja teÂż jestem na
tej samej wysokoÂści nad tym samym namiarem!"
Krótka przerwa, po czym odzywa siĂŞ gÂłos pierwszego pilota (bardzo gÂłoÂśno):
"Ty idioto! Ty jesteÂś moim drugim pilotem!"

Tax#4
Facet, o którym bĂŞdzie mowa, byÂł Âświetnym pilotem, ale nie bardzo potrafiÂł
uspokoiĂŚ pasaÂżerów. Pewnego razu samolot lÂądujÂący przed nim rozwaliÂł sobie
oponĂŞ podczas lÂądowania, a jej gumowe szczÂątki rozleciaÂły siĂŞ po caÂłym
pasie. Polecono mu poczekaĂŚ aÂż pas zostanie sprzÂątniĂŞty. A oto jego
ogÂłoszenie do pasaÂżerów:
"Panie i panowie, obawiam siĂŞ, Âże bĂŞdziemy mieli niewielkie opóÂźnienie w
przylocie. Na dole zamkniĂŞto lotnisko do chwili, gdy to, co zostaÂło z
ostatniego samolotu, który tam wylÂądowaÂł, zostanie usuniĂŞte."

Sorry, Âże dÂługie i w dziwnym jĂŞzyku, ale chyba warto siĂŞ trochĂŞ pomĂŞczyĂŚ:

#1
The Queen and Princess Anne are out for a drive in one of the Queen's Range
Rovers. Suddenly some armed robbers leap out of the bushes and stop the car.
"Give us the money", they shout at the Queen.
"But I'm the Queen of England, I have no need for money."
"Oh, shit", says the leader of the armed band, and turns to Anne.
"Give us yer jewels."
"But I don't wear my jewels all the time, only on state occasions." The
armed robbers look fed up, when suddenly they hear the sound of wailing
sirens approaching.
"Quick, out of the car! We'll have the Range Rover at least," and with that
the robbers drive off. As the Queen and Anne are waiting for the Police to
get there, Anne turns to the Queen, "What did you do with all the cash you
had? You're always loaded."
"Ah," says the Queen, "I saw the robbers and in the few seconds before they
got to the car I rolled up my notes and tucked them into that little place
that only women have."
Reaching under her skirt, she produces several thousand pounds in notes.
"And what did you do with your jewels? You always wear lots of
jewellery, my dear." The Queen says to Anne.
"Well, like you, in those few seconds before the robbers got to the car, I
slipped off my rings, necklaces and tiara, and like you, slipped them into
that little place that only women have."
Reaching down she plucks out her jewellery. They both sit quietly for a few
minutes, before the Queen turns to Anne...
"You know, if Fergie had been with us, we could still have the Range
Rover."

#2
A young man is wandering, lost, in a forest when he comes upon a
small house. Knocking on the door he is greeted by an ancient Chinese man
with a long gray beard.
'I'm lost,' said the young man. 'Can you put me up for the night?'
'Certainly,' the Chinese man said, 'but on one condition. If you so much as
lay a finger on my daughter I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese
tortures known to man.'
'OK,' said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty old as well,
and entered the house.
Over dinner the daughter came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful and
had a fantastic body. She was obviously attracted to the young man as she
couldn't keep her eyes off him during the meal. Remembering the old man's
warning he ignored her and went up to bed alone. However, once in bed he
could not stop thinking about the girl. Finally he could bear it no longer
and snuck into her room for a night of passion. He was careful to keep
everything quiet so the old man wouldn't hear and, near dawn, he crept back
to his room, exhausted but happy.
He woke the next morning to feel a pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes
he saw a Large rock on his chest with a note on it that read:
'Chinese Torture 1:Large rock on chest.''Well, that's pretty crappy,' he
thought. 'If that's the best the old man can do then I don't have much to
worry about.'He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw
the boulder out.As he did so, he noticed another note on it that read:
'Chinese Torture 2: Rock tied to left testicle.'In a panic he glanced down
and saw the rope that was already getting close to taut. Figuring that a few
broken bones was better than castration he jumped out of the window after
the boulder. As he plummeted towards the ground he saw a large sign on the
ground that read:
'Chinese Torture 3: Right testicle tied to bed post.'

#3
A man was interviewed for a job.
"were you in the service?" asked the interviewer.
"yes, I was a marine" replied the applicant.
"did you see any active duty?
"yes I was in Vietnam for 2 years and I have a partial disability"
"may I ask what happened?"
"well I had a grenade go off between my legs and I lost both testicles"

"when does everyone else start only I don't want to be treated any
differently because of my disability"
"everyone else starts at 8am but I might as well be honest with you.
Nothing gets done between 8 and 10. We just sit around scratching our balls
trying to decided what to do first".

Pozdrawiam,
Krzysztof Koziarek

You can hardly blame the French. France is example number one when comes to
natural selection of a nation's character.

Gallic Wars - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of
French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian.
Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who
inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are
victorious only when not led by a Frenchman."
Italian Wars - Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose
two wars when fighting Italians.
Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots
Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant, but manages to
get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other
participants started ignoring her.
War of Devolution - Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as
chapeaux.
The Dutch War - Tied
War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost,
but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the
world over to label the period as the height of French military power.
War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. The War also gave the French their
first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.
American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future
Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far
more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the
Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of
the fighting."
French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also
French.
The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!)
due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British
footwear designer.
The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat
boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.
World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United
States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep
with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread
use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French
bloodline.
World War II - Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and
Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.
War in Indochina - Lost. French forces plead sickness, take to bed with the
Dien Bien Flu
Algerian Rebellion - Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by
a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of
Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to
the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish,
Vietnamese and Esquimaux.
War on Terrorism - France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to
Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese
ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.

pozdrowka
lekomin inc

Oto pewna wariacja oryginaÂłu tego tekstu, gdzie kaÂżde zdanie zawiera sÂłowo
"fuck":

"What the fuck was that"........................Mayor of Hiroshima
"Look at all those fucking Indians".............General Custer
"Where the fuck's all the water coming from"....Captain of the Titanic
"That's not a fucking gun"......................John Lennon
"The fucking throttle's stuck!".................Geoff Back
"Sleep, who needs fucking sleep ?"..............Geoff Back
"Reading, its only fucking 60 miles away !".....Geoff Back
"Where the fuck did that central reservation
come from ???"...........................Geoff Back
"Who's going to fucking know"...................President Nixon
"Head's are going to fucking roll"..............Anne Boleyn
"Who let that fucking woman drive"..............Space shuttle captain
"Watch him, he'll have some fucker's eye out"...King Harold
"I thought I could smell fucking petrol"........Nikki lauda
"What fucking map"..............................Mark Thatcher
"She's just a fucking secretary"................Cecil Parkinson
"Any fucker can understand that"................Einstein
"It fucking looks like her".....................Picasso
"What fucking log"..............................Richard Branson
"What the fuck do you mean I'm forever
blowing bubbles"........................Michael Jackson
"How the fuck do you work that out".............Pythagorus
"You want what on the fucking ceiling"..........Michaelangelo
"Fuck-a-duck"...................................Walt disney
"Why ? - because its fucking there".............Edmund Hilary
"I didn't want to fucking go anyway"............Seb Coe
"Just a fucking wall"...........................Peter Elliot
"I don't suppose its fucking raining"...........Joan of Arc
"What a way to make a fucking living"...........Cynthia Payne
"Who gives a fuck what its name is".............Elizabeth II
"I haven't got a fucking clue"..................Miss Marple
"Scattered showers my fucking arse".............Noah
"Armada, what the fuck is an armada"............Sir Francis Drake

Cytat:
| W oryginale kaÂżde zdanie zawieraÂło sÂłowo "fuck" i to byÂło atrakcjÂą tych
| zdaĂą, tÂłumaczenie tego na rozmaite polskie przekleĂąstwa nie ma sensu.
ÂŚmiem wÂątpiĂŚ, zwÂłaszcza w przypadku Pitagorasa. Po prostu ktoÂś (K.W.)
uwaÂża,
Âże jest Âśmieszny, jak zmyÂśla takie cytaty. (MoÂże nawet nie zmyÂślaÂł, tylko
od
innego dowcipnisia ÂściÂągaÂł.) PuÂściÂłby jakÂąÂś porzÂądnÂą ÂślÂąskÂą wiÂązankĂŞ, to
przynajmniej moÂżna by siĂŞ czegoÂś nauczyĂŚ.
U.

wiadomoÂści
| | 10 najsÂłynniejszych powiedzeĂą w historii, które zawieraÂły przekleĂąstwo
| 1. "Co to kurwa byÂło?" - Burmistrz Hiroszimy
| 2. "SkÂąd sie wzieli ci wszyscy pieprzeni Indianie?" - General Custer
(pod
| Little Big Horn)
| 3. "I kazdy pieprzony idiota moze to zrozumiec!" - Einstein
| 4. "Ona tak naprawde wyglada, do kurwy nedzy!" - Picasso
| 5. "Jak, kurwa, to rozwiazales?" - Pitagoras
| 6. "Co ty chcesz miec na tym pieprzonym suficie?!" - Michal Aniol
| 7. "Kurwa, nie przypuszczam zeby teraz spadl deszcz" - Joanna d'Arc
| 8. "Pierdolona ulewa!" - Noe
| 9. "Potrzebna mi ta parada jak pieprzona dziura w glowie" -
J.F.Kennedy
| 10. "A kto sie kurwa dowie?" - Bill Clinton
| HĂŞĂŞĂŞ????
| K.W.
| --
| WysÂłano z serwisu Usenet w portalu Gazeta.pl -
| http://www.gazeta.pl/usenet/